Rags to Liches

Trash rares. Every set has 'em, and the odds are you're gonna crack one or two while trying to score a hot rare foil. It doesn't have to be that way, though. No, I'm not advocating ripping packs open before making you gaming shop purchases. Instead, why not turn garbage into gold? With a little ingenuity, any card - alright, goblin game excepted - can be turned into a theme deck gem.
Today's lesson: Nefarious Lich Lockdown.

Let's get the obvious out of the way: 99.9% of the time, Nefarious Lich blows. In a way, though, that makes it a useful card. For one, you'll never have trouble trading for one or four. More importantly, when you break it, you'll look like a friggin' genius. So how exactly does one go about doing this?

In order to break this seldom-used enchantment, you'll need both a surefire way to gain life and a productive means by which cards could be pitched. Enter Confessor and Zombie Infestation. Suddenly, for every two cards discarded, you gain two life. However, with the Lich in play, you would draw two cards instead. Chuck those to the infestation, create another 2/2 creature token, draw two cards, wash, rinse, repeat.

The Lich and the Infestation are black; Confessor is white. We're done choosing colours, right? Not so fast, killer. Let's not forget that should the Nefarious Lich leave play, even due to a bounce spell, you lose. Don't leave home without a splash of green for Tranquil Grove. Furthermore, this gives you access to an alternate win mechanism in Wild Mongrel. The broken hound serves two purposes here. First, it allows the deck to come out fast with teeth bared. Secondly, in the event you can't get an Infestation into the mix, the dog provides you another means to which you can cycle cards. Use black elimination to clear the path and let the dog swing for the fences.

Four copies each of Diabolic Edict and Ghastly Demise, plus three Innocent Bloods, clear out threats while you set up. Four Tutors let you fetch the Lich, as do your Sterling Groves if the situation is dire. Try to keep a Grove in play to protect you at all costs, though.

Lastly, the deck runs Life Burst. In the early game, it provides a shot in the arm to buy time to set up. It also lets you play the Lich in a pinch, netting a potential 16 cards for two mana. That oughta find the creature-kill you need, or the Confessor and Zombie Infestation needed to set up the kill mechanism.

The Deck

Black
4 Diabolic Edict
4 Diabolic Tutor
4 Ghastly Demise
3 Innocent Blood
2 Nefarious Lich
4 Zombie Infestation

Gold
3 Sterling Grove

Green
4 Wild Mongrel

White
4 Confessor
4 Life Burst

Lands
3 Forest
3 Krosan Verge
3 Plains
11 Swamp
2 Tainted Field
2 Tainted Wood


There are a few other options you can run. Echoing Courage can serve as insurance, but you should be able to spawn enough tokens to flood your opponent in one or two attacks. The confessor serves as a keystone in the deck, so a form of protecting him can be paramount; Floating Shield isn't a bad idea. Running Greater Auramancy instead of the Grove can let you stick to only two colours, smoothing out the deck. Lastly, if you have money, bombs like Damnation and Vindicate can tighten the deck up, and fetch lands can ease out the mana curve further. As is, however, the deck should work better than you'd expect.

The most fun decks to play are ones where your opponent laughs when you play a "rotten" card, then watches helplessly as that crapmeister causes their death. Sure, I wouldn't recommend whipping this bad boy out at a Vintage tourney, but heck, for sheer fun value, I'd rather play Nefarious Lich than Donate or Affinity any day.

As a parting note, try the Nefarious Lich with Words of Worship. Just for fun.