You Don't Say

Everything has its jargon. Sports often have uncomfortably violent colloquialisms. Professions have terms for the most specific of relevant situations. Wrestling announcers make up a new word every bleedin' sentence. So yes, Magic inevitably has developed its own set of lingo. Here are key terms, of past and present, quickly explained....

Ponza
What it is: A red landkill/board-control deck.
What it isn't: The guy from "Happy Days" who often said "Ayyyyyy!"

Engine
What it is: A combo in which you can directly trade one resource, such as life or cards, for another.
What it isn't: An unimpressive metal band that your friend's dweeby younger brother keeps insisting you try listening to.

Gas
What it is: A really good card; also, a card that fuels a deck's combo engine.
What it isn't: The most prevalent component of your dining room after eating Taco Bell.

No-Mar
What it is: A variant on the controllish Go-Mar deck that used Dromar, the Banisher; the "no" implies a version without the dragon.
What it isn't: An all-star shortstop for the Boston Red Sox.

Windmill Slam
What it is: A motion in which one forcefully throws down onto the table an amazing card that they just drew.
What it isn't: The new meal at Denny's restaurants in Holland.

Rainbow
What it is: A deck that utilizes all five colours.
What it isn't: Something hated by South Park's Cartman.

Weenie
What it is: A small, cheap and efficient creature, like Jackal Pup.
What it isn't: What you're thinking right now.

Fattie (Alt. Beater, Groundpounder, Beatstick)
What it is: A "large" creature, typically with at least 4 power and toughness.
What it isn't: Your mom. Oh wait, it totally is.

Beatdown
What it is: A deck strategy that involves attacking and generally dealing damage as quickly as possible.
What it isn't: What you get during your initiation into the Crips.

Mono
What it is: A deck that runs only one colour (i.e. "Mono-Blue")
What it isn't: A disease unlikely to be caught by Magic players.